Friday, September 16, 2005

Rob's Random Thoughts: Part 1

Here's some advice about social interaction. I apply it to dating, but this works with anyone. In this situation, a guy is asking a girl out on a date.

Guy: "Hi, would you like to go see a movie with me tomorrow night?"

Girl: "I can't...I'm busy."

Now, when the response is short like that, the guy is going to feel like the girl doesn't want to date him at all...and he's probably not going to ask her out again. If the girl wants to date the guy but she is really busy that night then she needs to make a counter offer. She needs to convey to the guy that she accepts his offer but it has to be another night. Like this:

Girl: "I can't...I'm busy. But, how about a different night? Like Friday?"

Or she could even be more vague.

Girl: "I can't...I'm busy. But maybe another night. Why don't you call me next week and we'll see."

I realize that this seems like common sense. But I often find that people don't follow it. Maybe you're having a stressful day when this person pops the question. Maybe your mind is far away. Maybe you're just a moron (we'll assume that one isn't true). You can apply this to friends, work, or family. Remember, people will always read into the things that you say....so choose your words carefully.


The preceding was paid for by Microsoft.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

guys read into things?

Trip Thomas said...

Well, perhaps lesser men don't. But those of us who are in touch with our feelings, and engage in healthy social interactions, are apt to notice the slight.

Isabelle said...

Wow. Rob, you are so insightful. I learn so much from you. I hope one day to be just like you.... except, you know, with boobs.

trailmonkey said...

well, can't say you never fail to get a reaction....a guy actually has to ask me out before i can reject him... let me get over THAT hurdle and then we'll discuss conversational dynamics