(un)Useful advice from adults

Whenever you watch a family-style movie there's always a scene where a parent gives some sage advice to their child. The kid is going through a major emotional crisis and this advice just magically makes it all better.

The problem with scenes like this is that it makes us believe that we can really do this with our kids. When I was younger I thought about being a father some day and always giving my son important advice to help him as he grows up. Heck, I still think about that. But ya know what? 90% of my advice will be crap that the kid doesn't listen to.

Think about it. How often has someone given you advice that you thought was stupid or inapplicable to the situation? "Sorry your girlfriend broke up with you, Jimmy. But think about it, every relationship you have is destined to failure until you find that right girl to marry." Ok, maybe that's a little extreme. But you get my point.

And this blog post isn't about that. In fact, I'm here to pass on some advice I received that was actually useful.

A majority of the people I know in this world are older than me. My clients, my teammates, the guys I play poker with, etc. So I often find someone trying to pass along a nugget of wisdom. And it's usually crap. Until a few months ago.

I was sitting at the poker table. I forget the conversation but I think I was commenting on the uncertainty of my future (career-wise). In fact, I often find myself uncertain of everything in life. What job do I want. Where do I want to live. What kind of woman do I want to marry. I feel like there are so many choices and directions that it's almost an overload.

And the guys at the table said that this was the one advantage of getting older. They said that by the time you get into your late 30s you don't have that uncertainty anymore (usually). By then most people have gotten married and have kids. They've settled down into a career in a city somewhere. In short, they've made their choices.

So, by then you come to accept that your life has taken one of those proverbial paths. You look forward to improving it, of course... but you're hopefully happy with the direction.

That made me feel better. Because I can't imagine going through the rest of my life always wondering which way to go.