Thinking: It's not just for smart people anymore

Lately my blogs have switched from Relationship advice to Life advice. Instead of wondering whether or not I'm capable of love and successful relationships, I wonder what I want from my career and how to get it.

Of course, these things overlap. And thus I feel justified in my tangents.

So here is today's advice: Think before you act.

Yes, you've all heard that advice before. But I think that many people don't really grasp the concept. When you're in a position to act, think about what the desired result is. Then act in a manner that will help move towards your goal. Here's an example.

Do you remember the girl who got engaged, while I was "going on dates" with her? If not, then it's ok... but I curse you for not reading my blogs religiously! ... um... anyway... So I thought that I would never speak to her again. And I don't say that because I hated her... but we only had a connection through dating (no mutual friends or colleagues) so it was safe to assume I would never even randomly meet her again some place.

Well, over the weekend she sent me an email. I'm not going to reveal the topic of her email, because it's not really important (also because the situation that the email created is still happening and I don't like to talk about stuff while it's still going on). I happened to be sitting at my computer when she sent the email and I began typing a response immediately. And then I stopped. I didn't know what I wanted to happen, and so I wasn't sure what to say.

So I spent the next day thinking about what I wanted. Did I want to say something mean and try to hurt this girl? Did I want to open up communication again? Did I want to be nice but make it clear that we are still not talking?

Once I figured out what I wanted, then I was able to effectively respond to her email.

And perhaps my advice shouldn't be "think before you act". Perhaps it should be "always identify the end goal before you act".

It's really that simple. Try it some time.